it has been so long since i last posted! didnt feel like blogging though.

sometimes just thinking, im only 19. at this age, wat are most teenagers doing? ahhaa.. but thinking of myself, im experiencing far too much at the age of 19. but looking from another angle, those series of events let me learn so much and one cant learn in their normal life. oh~ how abnormal is my life? -.-''''

im not going to buy any clothes this month. NOT A SINGLE PIECE OF CLOTHING! NO!!! I CAN DO IT!!!

went to unit for last last campcraft training for boys.. went there.. haha.. help out with the sch thingy instead.. let me have the chance to act OC/supervisor.. haha! sorry sir! LOL! ok.. then went jp for lunch.. yummys.. then came back to np room and chit chat.. oh man.. laugh madly. LOLS. once again, chichichan rocks ok!

went to hq for the competition.. well ok.. though got delay here and there due to the heavy rain.. still went on as usual.. here to say.. im proud of my boys.. yeah! as if im in the competition myself, kan chiong like mad. LOLS.

finally, im sick. bring it on. time to be weak.

im.sad
i feel so down.
why does things turn out this way.
am.i.really.being.replaced.
i.wan.to.think.no.more

am.i.just.too.naive...

alrights. monday 13th.. went to sch to help prepare valentine day.. cos going to sell up booth on tuesday to sell some chocolates and roses.. after that.. left around evening time.. met up with my dear xy for dinner.. and.. tell wat.. the valentine pizza promotion at pizza hut is -.-'''' . totally cannot make it. LOLS! xy.. agree right? too problem.

alright.. then 14th.. went to sch in the afternoon cos wasnt feeling quite well.. after that.. went to town and meet up with firda to get fatin birthday gift.. bought her a crumpler bag.. sure is kenna influence by me.. LOLS.. ok.. then fatin came.. then izzat came.. so we went to this nana thai restaurant at far east.. was happily chit chatting and eating.. and then.. guess wad? this god damn family is proud like nobody business.. but being the gd us, we ignore and was enjoying ourselves. then this mother or the grandmother of this damn family, walk past our table and went ' ssshhh.. ' and added some lines behind. OH COME ON! don't we have the freedom to tok? just becos ur family is eating quietly doesnt mean the rest cant tok while they are eating. EERKS. cant believe such people exist. turn off.

alrights. went to adidas at heeren to change my shirt. and there is this shoe which is made of pig skin i think, and firda, being excited over a damn cool shoe, went to touch it, then to realise it's PORK. LOL! went to toilet and wash her hand immediately. LOLS! and people out there, hair dye also have halal certified. so muslim can only buy those hair dyes with a halal stamp. do u all know abt it? LOL.

i hope you like the gift i made for you.
how i wish i pass it to you personally.
i wan to see you so much, but im afraid that u dun wan to see me.
anymore.
i want to care for u so much, but i dunno how to express myself.
it hurts being helpless. it really do.
i thought of giving u surprises, but im afraid you won't like them.

tell me wat to do.

finally back to blogging after so long.. too many things have happen until im ding ding dong dong..

well.. overal.. life wasnt quite smooth.. too many happenings.. sometimes wonder whether am i right or wrong, or they dun get my good intentions.. well.. wat is done cant be undone.. too much things have happen at one go.. i dunno how to handle.. i tried.. but did i fail or wad?

i finally understand the meaning of helpless. i wanted to be there so much for you.. but you refuse.. the only thing i can do is to stand outside and wait for you.. but to no avail.

start hating me. don't stop.

she.has.lost.herself.
find.her.back.
quickly.
before.shes.all.alone.

on this valentine eve, i still love you as much as before. and even more.

alright.. YES! FATIN and FIRDA celebrate my birthday at swensens.. LOL.. fatin.. pls look here.. haha! alright.. and of cos.. damn happening in the swensens.. with some stupid comments on the menu.. adding with some social life and kopitiams.. LOL.. watevers.. enjoy ok!

been finding time to catch some movies. but cant seem to find the time. come'on.. time.. where are you~ lame.

nothing interesting been into my life. hahas. living as usual.

but i believe that one day, i will be killed by the food i ate. LOLS!